Wednesday

The Weight Watcher


Lucy inherited two major traits from her father, an obsession for bird-watching and some weight issues. Every once in a while she talks about trying to lose weight. The thing is, she loves food, hates exercise, hasn't enough money for a liposuction procedure, and doesn't want to fuck up her gag reflex that allows her to treat her boyfriend with good blowjobs. She once told me that she wishes there was a transgenic species of birds that would peck off all of the fat leaving the rest of her body intact. Like those little fishes who eat off your dead skin cells. Lucy would only want to keep the fat on her face and boobs, letting the rest of it be painfully pecked away... 


Science fiction writer Arthur C. Clark, said that any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic... Bring on the weight loss magicians.

21 comments:

  1. NOT THE BEE- oh wait, never mind.

    Anyway, you know what I like about your posts? You have a knack for telling a story, and conveying all the necessary information, in just a paragraph or two. That's a pretty enviable trait, if I do say so myself.

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  2. As Voltech says :) The stories really add to your pictures.
    Well done.

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  3. Voltech - thanks a lot, man. even though i love complexity (like in the works of Joyce, Kant, Bach, etc), i try to keep this project as short as simple as possible.

    Laury - thanks. i think they're actually symbiotic.

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  4. I´d like to loose weight, too, but that would be a bit too much for me XD

    Is the sentence with the gag reflex referring to bulimia???

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  5. I should lose some weight too. The birds give off an impressive effect, but I wouldn't like this method either. Birds sort of scare me.

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  6. Kat - yes, bulimia it is. i'd choose a less stressful method, as well.

    Elizabeth - if they're screeching and coming at you i can imagine them being pretty scary; just as Hitchcock showed us

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  7. Lucy should try ingesting tape worms. I hear they do the trick!

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  8. Omg tape worms? I saw a documentary about a man who voluntarily swallowed some of their eggs to test out what will happen some time later. I still remember the scene when he killed his worm several weeks later with pills, put it full length down on the floor and laid himself next to it. The parasite was three times longer than him and if not dead, it would have grown even longer....

    Must be very convenient to let the worm do all the work for you, but I couldn't live with the fact that something like this lives within me...

    Btw I love the discussions that start right after Gabriels new drawing was posted! :-)

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  10. Tape worms are sick! I think I'd rather try my luck with the birds or with purging.
    This post is pretty close to the bone.

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  11. Jorg - i actually have a friend who's very thin and everybody's always asking him if he has a tape worm, but he just has a fast metabolism.

    Kat - 3 times longer, wow, that's wicked. i enjoy the discussions, as well. a big thanks to you and to everyone who shares their thoughts.

    Melissa - they really are sick. and i already feed my cat, i'm not going to pay for another 'pet'.

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  12. Life would have been much easier with such birds...

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  13. indeed. it used to be a girl thing, but even guys worry with weight nowadays.

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  14. It's not just the birds I see. There are bags tied on her hands and a bag on her head tied with a rope around her mouth. This illustration is a great allegory of a debilitating psychological condition and the wishful ways we would like to cure ourselves, painful though this one would be.

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  15. nicely observed and put, David. thanks. some things are skin deep; others, like fat, go even deeper.

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  16. Lol, not so in all cases - have you heard of medical maggots?

    Youtube is there if you dare!

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  17. Yeah the medical maggots... They're eating all the rotten stuff out of a severe purulent open wound and leave only healthy flesh. I think this is a good effect but for me it is the same as the tape worm... I couldn't stand such living and disgusting things live withn me! Even when the maggots are just living in the wound for some days to clean it up....

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  18. I would eat a maggot every once in a while just to even things up. ;0

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  19. blargh! yeah, i think i'd rather keep being fat.

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  20. Riotbreather13:42

    Loosing weight leads to transgenic birds, tape worms and eating maggots? what madness ;-)
    Awesome pic!

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  21. thanks Riotbreather. madness is part of the magic.

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Crack it up...